Sometimes I go through life thinking "I couldn't possibly add one more thing to my plate." But then, something comes up, and I rise to the occasion. Even if nothing big presents itself, I usually find something to do to put myself in the "busy" category. Good or bad, right or not, I've always been one to fill up the calendar, or even if my happenings aren't calendar-worthy, I generally fill and sometimes over-fill my time.
Ever since Hunter has arrived life has been full in such a new, unique, and unusual way. I say unusual because I'm not used to falling asleep with questions such as these:
~How many times will I wake up during the night? (new thought)
~What time will I first be needed in the morning? (No more "9:00" set office hours?)
~If someone calls to get together, am I "busy" or not? (I don't always know until Hunter lets me know...)
~What will I make for dinner? (Will I have any clean dishes to even get started?)
~When did I last shower? (I honestly haven't kept very good track of this one. Please let me know if it is an issue)
~Didn't I wear these clothes yesterday? (and will most likely wear them tomorrow too)
~How does anyone have more than 1 child? (frequent thought, especially in Hunter's first 6 weeks of life...)
~What did I really "accomplish" today?
Although I am busy and life seems full, I also feel so free as well! Without a daily routine, and a job to run off to, I am so much more free to love on my little baby, learn new things about patience and sacrifice, and experience a new element of life that not everyone gets to, or desires to experience. I have only been home for 4 months, but I feel as though I have learned so much already. I am so excited to experience each season with my son and walk with him through the tears, the giggles, the teething, the sicknesses, and so on.
If I have ever had a woe-is-me moment in the past months, I am kindly reminded by my conscience that I am SO lucky and blessed that I not only CAN stay home, but that Jake gets to stay home with us for 3 months out of the year! Although I have tried hard not to, I recognize that I have taken this all for granted to some degree. Every day I am trying to thank God for this unique, unusual, wonderful time of my life.
Although I fall asleep with new questions in my head, I also wake up with new energy and resolve to love the place I'm in and enjoy it to the max.
Thoughts Revisited:
~I have learned to almost enjoy waking up in the middle of the night. I'm the only one that Hunter wants at these odd hours. No one else can replace me!
~I have appreciated the fact that friends would even call to ask if I still wanted to get together.
~ I love that some days I can still pull together a meal that tastes, and even looks good! (I sometimes even get to the homemade ice cream that we are addicted too...)
~I have learned that showering is definitely overrated, and if you wear the same clothes every day, you save money on your energy bill! (The saved $$ will go towards washing the millions of cloth diapers for the little guy)
~I realize that having more than one child will change life dramatically but I am already looking forward to adding to our family (not yet!) and learning how to rise to the occasion of more demands and a tighter schedule.
~And what did I really "accomplish" today? Well, if nothing else, I am helping to keep my baby healthy and happy, and attempting to learn how to love God and people more and more.
So could I possibly add one more thing to my plate? Absolutely. In fact someday we'll hopefully add another son or daughter or both! to the mix. I may add a new job or new responsibilities. Jake may end up working during some summers, or even getting a new job altogether. But, for now, I love this special one-child time of life that will really only come once-in-a-lifetime.